Tuesday, May 29, 2007

In the dentist's chair

My lower teeth are in a quandary. There are braces there, but my teeth have no space to migrate. The original plan was for me to get a pre-molar removed so today, my mind was conditioned for a tooth extraction.

The worst part of a tooth extraction is when the dentist injects the anesthesia. The cold feeling of a syringe feels awkward inside the gum, but there's also this weird sensation of the medicine flowing in. After that, it's pretty cool when half my face is numb. I also like the part where the tooth is actually pulled out. It's a real treat to hear the action inside my mouth. My dentist uses this pliers-looking thing to grab hold of the tooth, then it's all grunt work from there. Dentists have wicked-cool gadgets and exceptional upper body strength.

The first thing I hear is a crunching sound. That's when my dentist is loosening the tooth, carefully yanking it from side to side. Then, there's this louder krrrrsssshhh sound when it finally gives. It's also oddly satisfying to see how big the tooth really is. I have two perfectly functional teeth wrapped in tissue paper on my dresser. I would have had a third for my boni collection, if not for my dentist's last-minute decision to just install a spring between two brakcets and wait for the teeth to make space. I was slightly disappointed at the turn of events, I was really looking forward to taking home a tooth. The bright side is that my eating habits remain unhampered. Hurray!

There was another lady in the clinic this afternoon, and she sure found my mouth interesting. Enjoying her attention, I even volunteered information about the status of my dental health. When I sat in the dentist's chair, I thought my encounter with her was over. Instead, I had two women poking around my mouth, talking about the severity of my condition. From the conversation happening overhead, I could tell that she and my dentist were old college friends. They had nicknames for each other and kept beginning sentences with "Maalala mo nung..." The most intriguing bit was when they were talking about anesthesiology class and my dentist said, "Ay, ako binayaran ko yung in-injection ko."

"Ah talaga? Kami noon, wala kaming nakita," the lady replied wistfully. What do you think this means? Are there penniless blokes out there who would let dentistry students practice injecting anesthesia into their mouths for a pretty price? It's a little bit like donating blood, but scarier.

The fish bowl in my dentist's waiting room is gone. Its two occupants have left this earthly plane for Fish Heaven. Upon entering her office after a three-day trip to Manila, my dentist came upon the heady scent of death and decay. Her fish had gone belly up. They were good fish, but were stuck living in a bowl that had seen better days. Let's all take moment of silence.

15 seen below:

the philosphical bastard said...

just the thought of the dentist makes me cringe already. lalo na nung nabasa ko yung nagpapabayad... yikes.

may those fishes rest in peace.

lei said...

okay, i think i should have my molars removed too. NOT! lol

Alternati said...

I wonder if the fish got the belly-up idea from watching Nemo. You sure they were dead? They might be swimming happily in plastic bags in the Sydney Harbor. What is with dentist clinics and fish bowls?

I like it when a dentist sticks that stick with a round mirror in the end in my mouth. I get a tingling sensation when the (usually) cold metal hits the inside of my mouth. I, however, detest that pointed thing he uses to poke around your mouth.

Hey, I just linked you up too. Anyone from my fair city is an instant blogmate. :)

maika said...

hey metal mouth! hang in there. mauubos din yang ngipin mo in no time at all. haha!!!

Poli said...

Good thing my mouth and jaw are large enough to accommodate all of my teeth.

You could use your extracted teeth as pendants for a necklace you know.

missP said...

yikes, i almost couldn't finish reading your post. just imagining the drilling noise from a dentist's clinic makes me cringe already..

but it's true, may mga people na nagpapabayad sa mga aspiring dentists , just like may mga cadavers na binibili ng mga aspiring doctors to study upon.. eeeewwwww!

kubiyat said...

paolo: my dentist is actually sad that she makes people cringe. :D

lei: i was thinking of you when i wrote this. gawin mo na, huy.

alternati: thanks for the link! baguio bloggers rule!

if the fish got the idea from finding nemo, they were in for a nasty surprise. in baguio, i don't think all drains lead to the ocean...

maika: actually, it's brace face :D

poli: now, there's an attractive idea. sabi nung dentista ko, i should dip the teeth in hydrogen peroxide so they get preserved and become whiter. look, they're out of my mouth but whiter! para na silang semi-precious stones. haha.

missP: i'm glad you finished reading it anyway. :)

omaygad...it's true then? ala, nakakatakot naman. what if they poke the wrong vein and you have to spend a week using only the upper part of your face to express youself? wait, that's botox. scary!

Talamasca said...

A trip to the dentist is more or less tantamount to a taste of Dante's Purgatorio! And ZOMG, horrible set of braces! Leaves you looking like a nerd and starves you to death! LOL!

Anyhoo, thanks for blog crashing! Come back anytime! Kbai. ;-p

Jhed said...

OMG! Do you really need to elaborate on the tooth extracting part?! Haha!

But yeah, the crunching sounds.. ugh.. gives me the chills.

I hate going to the dentists. Not because I'm scared, it's so boring. All you do is lie in a retractbale seat and have your mouth open for like.. 2 hours! I almost fell asleep in one of my visits to the dentist.

It's excruciatingly boring! Haha!

kubiyat said...

talamasca: that's the weird part. my braces aren't starving me. when i first had them (sure it always felt like i had rocks in my mouth), i went on an eating rampage. i figure i was rebelling against the "you can't eat because of the metal in your mouth" stereotype :D

jhed: my dentist works pretty quickly, actually. and she spared me the boredom by letting me see what she was doing with a mirror.

a friend of mine did fall asleep during a trip to the dentist. he said it was an invigorating nap. haha.

p.s. to both of you: may i add you to my link list?

nichole said...

Hello Kubi. Thank you for dropping by my site. Your detailed chronicle about dentistry was fantastic, it made me cower in my seat and wished everyone has perfect teeth so the occupation 'dentist' would never come into existence. Condolences to the fishes...*silence* :)

jemme said...

woOOOwWW! ganda ng blog... visit ka din sa blog ko ^___^ may unforgettable experience ako dun na cgurado akong tatawa ka sa saya pag nabasa mo! hehe ^__^

eloiski said...

Huwaaa! Ayoko nung dentist ko dati! Pinalala niya problema ng ngipin ko dati! Pero isang beses ko pa lang nasubukan magpabunot ng ngipin kasi kusa siyang naaalis! Nyahaha! Atlis tipid! At oo nga pala okey lang na ilink mo ko. . . wahihihI! hindi po ako tsong kuya ah tsang po ako! ahahah!

kubiyat said...

nichole: oh no...it wasn't my intention to make people cower. i'm championing my dentist. hope you give yours a chance :)

the fish feel the love.

jemme: salamat din po sa pagdaan. nabasa ko na yung tungkol sa unforgettable experience mo at ako'y sadyang naaliw. :D

eloiski: noong mga bata pa kami, kumagat ang pinsan ko ng isang chico at kusa ring natanggal ang kanyang ngipin. nahanap nalang naming nakabaon sa prutas. winner.

laizo said...

the absolute worst thing your dentist can say when he has that drill thingy:

ooops

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